This was written in 1998, when I first discovered this lifestyle. Filled with naive excitement and dreams of my fairy tale visions coming true, I met my first brick wall after only a few weeks into my journey. It was the first time I had encountered objectification within the lifestyle - I was treated as a thing by a friend's "Dominant". It was the wrong kind of objectification, but at the time I didn't know enough to distinguish good from bad.
I remember being hurt by this. I had such wonderful dreams of what this lifestyle could bring me. I was walking away from the lifestyle, disillusioned, thinking that there was no way that I could fit in if I had to feel this poorly about myself. This was not the stuff dreams were made of.
That hurt turned to anger - thankfully. I fought back, and this was written when the anger had set in and the pain had receded. Remembering how little I knew then, it's interesting that this "letter" still stands on its own merits, and to this day very much represents my core beliefs.
I, for one, am thankful that my moment's anger allowed me stay in the lifestyle and not lose sight of my dreams - many of which have already come true.
Essentially, the birth of Different Equals happened those many years ago with this letter.
dove
Dear Sir,
I have watched, Sir, silently. I have watched Dominants "teach" submissives their places in this lifestyle. I have learned much, Sir.
I am not a door mat. I too have opinions and ideas that merit being heard, if they are offered respectfully.
I am not a waitress. That I choose to serve only One does not make me any less submissive.
I am not a whore. I serve and please One, discretely and respectfully, as do others all over this world.
I am not an animal. The lead attached to my collar is a sign of ownership, not captivity.
I am not a piece of meat. I have feelings and emotions.
I have the right to be treated as a human being. After all, I am human.
I have the right not to be perfect. If I am trying to learn, my efforts should be rewarded with patience, not impatient anger.
I have the right to be respected. I offer respect, and deserve the same in return.
I have the right to choose my Dominant. I alone make that choice, it cannot be made for me, or against my will.
I have the right to have my limits respected. A contract is just that, a contract - verbal or formal.
I have the right to feel special. My submission runs deep, and is only offered to One who is worthy of it.
I have the right to contribute to the relationship. The 's' is an equally important part of D/s.
I am half of a whole. You Sir, are the other half. Both can only be complete when with the other half. Both are very special.
We would do well to both remember that, Sir.
Be well.